Finding Veronica

I’m not sure why I came up with the name Veronica for my muse just now but we’ll roll with it. At least until she shows up and decides if she likes it.

Yep, she’s gone AWOL. I haven’t heard from her in a while. Well, I’m not sure that’s completely accurate. The ideas Veronica and I generate are not missing. It’s more like

women-arguing-2_orig

Veronica and I are not on speaking terms at the moment. I’m not sure which of us is to blame for that. Or if either of us is to blame for it. Blame is an ugly word. Let’s not us that.

Veronica and I are…socially incompatible at the moment.

…that sounds just as weird. *sigh*

This is November. It’s National Novel Writing Month, NaNoWriMo. I’m supposed to be letting the words fly from my fingertips and writing fifty thousand words or more in 30 days. This is my second blog. Do Facebook posts count? Granted, there was a death in the family last month but I have had no desire to write. Not like I used to. Historically you would find me with no less than two notepads of various sizes and half a dozen pens in multiple colors. People know me for this so well they often gift me with writing paraphernalia.

At the moment, I might have a pen or two in my purse. My phone has a notepad app on it but I’m not sure I have a piece of paper on me other than a tissue. How does this even happen? I have felt distanced from my writing for a while now. For a long time, the writing was an escape for me. I don’t have as many things I need to escape now. I’m not sure how to channel the same energy into the writing now that the emotional need is different. I’ve tried really hard not to let go of the writing. When I look back at some of the things I’ve done, I really like the work I’ve done and think it would be publishable if I keep at it. But then I don’t do anything with it. I don’t write anything else. Veronica does come knocking. I get more ideas and I do write them down so I don’t lose them. But they don’t grow into anything more. It saddens me to see notes scribbled in a notebook between shopping lists waiting for me to shape them into characters and plot.

Sometimes it feels like I don’t know how to get motivated. Which is absurd when you think about it. As many blogs as I’ve written about how to get your ass in gear over everything else, I should be able to figure this one out. Yet I here I sit with Veronica looking over my shoulder wondering why I’m not working on the idea she gave me. Hopefully she won’t get too mad at me.

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November

Much has happened since I wrote you last. Most notably I lost a family member whom I loved dearly. I can not express how important it is to tell your people you love them.

It is equally important to take care of yourself. Physically, mentally and emotionally. Eat smart, drink plenty of water, get enough rest. And for the love of all that’s sacred in your universe, stop smoking.

The onset of my aunt’s health issues began a year and a half ago. In 18 months she was hospitalized at least 6 times where she was put on a ventilator. After 30 years of smoking her lungs and heart were so damaged they couldn’t recover. She had other health problems, too. But the smoking was the one thing she couldn’t get control of. It always controlled her.

Take control of your health. Do something good for yourself each day. Drink an extra glass of water. Stretch an extra 10 minutes. Skip the second helping. Get up and dance for 20 minutes. Take a walk with a friend. Meditate. Sing in the shower. Sing with your kids. Read a book. Paint a picture. Visit a museum or a park. Anything that engages mind, body and spirit. Just get moving!

Life is a beautiful thing. Make time to live it.